It KNOWS!

Every night, before I collapse into bed, I make sure I have 3 things within my reach. My meter, a water bottle, and some sort of food. Last night, I was so tired, I didn't go through my usual routine, and I left my meter lying on my desk. I swear, my diabetes KNOWS I forgot to grab it. So, of course, I went low last night. I woke up confused, sweating and HOT. I reach for my meter. It's not there. I wake up enough to realize it's still sitting on my desk. I am now really annoyed with myself. Granted, my desk is about 5 steps from my bed, but still! I have to jump down from my bed (it's kind of bunked on top of my dresser. It's about 3.5 feet off the ground), and try not to trip over the stuff on the floor. I check myself.63. Not a bad low, but enough to make me want to eat, eat, eat. I first open my tiny dorm fridge and grab a juice box. Not the usual Arthur Juicy Juice (since no one seems to carry them anymore), but apple juice none the less. Then I eat a fruit snack. Then a granola bar. I know I've over done it, but I don't care. The sound of the wrappers cause my roommate to roll over, but not enough to wake her up. I take confidence in the fact that if I needed her, all I would have to do was say her name, and she would be ready to help me. After restraining myself from eating another granola bar,and wait for my pump to beep it's friendly, "Check your blood glucose. Your last blood glucose was low." I love that! I no longer have to remember what time I last checked myself, and watch the minutes tick by on the clock. When it beeps, I check again. 108. I'm happy with that, although it's a little high of a jump. Now I start the debate with myself on how much to bolus. I know I need extra insulin, but insulin also make me go lower. I do not want to end up with another low. I decide to bolus for 40 grams over 15 minutes. I decided fairly well. This morning I woke up at 181. Not bad for a food fest at 2am. Morale of the story? The one night I forget my meter, I will go low! It almost never fails! Is it irrational? Yes. But yet it seems strangely true.....
Jen
PS Thanks to everyone for all your comments. I'll reply to you sooner or later. I was blown away by all the support! I also appreciate all the responses on my medic alert symbol. I needed it for a paper I was writing.

Today is my debut in the D-blogging world. Welcome to all my new readers. I hope you like it! It's really not much, just somewhere to vent. And now I need to ask a question of everyone who ventures over here from Six Until Me. (Thanks Kerri for giving the courage to "go public") Does anyone know what the technical term for the medical alert symbol is??


Thanks in advance to anyone who can help me, and welcome to my blog!

They're back!

My beloved quick sets are here!
Hurray!
Party in the streets (as long as it's not outside my window, like the drinkers last night...)
As soon as I got the shipment, I wanted to rip the stupid Inset out, right then and there. I contained myself until I got back to the dorm.
I am SO glad to have them back! I feel like I found a long lost friend. (Even though I was only without them for 3 whole days)
Thank you Minimed, for my wonderful quicksets. (That is the one and only thing I thank them for. I generally don't like Minimed as a company. There are many good reasons why I switched to Cozmo, but that's a whole other post)

Insets

Last night, I had to do a site change. I am out of quick-sets, so I had to use a Inset. I got the Insets about a year ago because everyone that I talked to that used them loved them. Plus, who can ignore a new diabetes product? Not me! Oh! And it comes in fun colors! I mean, who could resist these things? It took about 2 sets for me to realize that I HATED them. The inseter is HUGE and I found it hard to get a good grip on the buttons, which are really indentations, to insert the stupid thing. Then after it is inserted, I felt like I was going to pull the whole thing out when I pulled the inserter off. And despite what the site claims, it is not easy to disconnect and reconnect. It physically hurts each time I have to disconnect! Not cool! I'll take my quick-sets thank you! I am looking forward to see how the new cleo sets turn out http://www.cleoinfusionsets.com/. I like the idea of a slower insertion, which the cleo sets offer. We shall see! Until next time....

Not a good D week.

This week has not been the best for me, diabetes care wise.
~ Tuesday afternoon/night I was in the ER for horrible stomach pain and nausea. Actually, my numbers stayed pretty good. I had massive ketones most of the day, due to not eating. The ER doctors were all very concerned about my "wildly swinging blood sugars." My range that day was from 85 to 202. I was pretty proud of that! Another doctor told me that I should really watch my numbers, because my blood sugar was up to 160 when they checked it. I smiled, nodded, and ignored that part of their advice.
~ Last night, for the first time in my memory, I had a "HI" blood sugar. All I know is that I was over 500. This was a new experience for me. I was 366 earlier, but I thought that was from a poorly chosen temp basal and a cookie. I took an injection, not really having any idea how much to take. I ended up taking 10 units, which if none of my earlier correction had gotten in and I was only 500, not higher would bring me to 200. I when down to 430 before I went to bed, and I was up every hour after that checking. I slowly came down to 78 when I woke up.
~ Due to poor planning, a string of bad sites, and the holidays, I am running out of sites. This is not a place I want to be. I am now out of my usual quick-sets, and I will have to use some left over Insets. I do not like the Insets. I realize I am in the minority, but they just are as comfortable to me as the quicksets are. I have 6 of those left. That SHOULD last me 18 days, but I haven't had very good luck with sites lately. My supplies are supposed to be here Wednesday or so, so I should be OK. I hate the thought of going back on shots, even if for only a few days. No matter how much Lantus I take, I always end up in 400's. I know if I was on it for a few days it would get better, but that first day or so would not be fun.
Now I'm going to send this rambling post off into cyberspace where no one will read it, and I will get back to work on my nursing application essay.

PS. Blogger's spell check makes me laugh. It can't handle diabetes terms. It wanted to turn "quicksets" into suicide. Hmmmmmm...... not sure how the two connect.

Scary

Today, I am writing about a D experience that had me scared out of my wits. This past week was my first every college exam week, and let me tell you, it was NOT fun. I had 3 exams on Monday and 2 on Tuesday. I'm not sure if I've ever studying so hard in my academic career. Tuesday morning I had an exam at 10am. I got up at 7, studied for a while, went to breakfast and headed off to my exam. I get to the room only to find that my exam starts at 10:30am, not 10. So I head back through the freezing cold back to my dorm. As I'm sitting in front of my computer pretending to be studying, I feel a horrible wave of nausea come over me. The first thought that rushes through my mind is, "Oh no! I can't get that stomach flu NOW! I have to take an exam." The second almost always present thought follows behind. "I'd better check my blood sugar." I grab my meter, whip out my pump (I use the CozMonitor) and wait. 50. 50!!! I look, and I have close to 4 units on board. This will put me at about negative 90. But unlike normal, I do not want anything to eat. I want to throw up. My room mate, who the wonderful people at my college put me with, is not around. She's usually pretty good at getting me to eat. I finally decide that I can probably manage some juice. I whip open my pitifully small fridge, and guess what? The juice is GONE. I grab a fruit snack, my trusty friend in times of hypoglycemia, and slowly start eating. As the food hits my stomach, the nausea slowly decreases, and I start eating as fast as my hands can hit my mouth. As the panic of throwing up or passing out decreases, I look at the clock. #()%&)!!! It's 10:27, and my exam starts at 10:30. I grab a little more food, grab my trusty #2 pencils, and I run out the door. I got to my exam 5 minutes late, in a panic. I start taking the exam, with my head still in a fog. About 10 minutes into it, it hits me to recheck my blood sugar and bolus a little for all the carbs I ate. In my hurray, I shut the "friendly" your last blood sugar was low alarm off. I check and I'm up to a whopping 90. I ate 100ish carbs, and I was only up to 90? I push down the panicked feeling and daringly bolus for 25 carbs. I waited the rest of the day for the rebound high that never came. I still have no idea why I went low. I know my breakfast bolus was fine. I guess the stress of exam week decided to rocket me from the 300's of the past few days to a nasty low. All I know is that I was scared. Very scared. I thought I might have to use my glucagon on myself. Or worse, that my roommate would come back to find me lying on the floor, or in the bathroom vomiting my guts out. Morale of the story? There is none! Other than, just maybe, that diabetes sucks, and I'm thankful that a thing like glucagon exists, if I needed it. Oh, and Diabetes sucks.

My first post, and it's a rant!

I've finally gotten up the courage to start a diabetes related blog. I've read many fantastic blogs, and I've been inspired to try it. I am not by any means a good writer. My spelling often will be wrong. I will often be stressed out and ranting. But I invite you to read. I've been living with diabetes for 17 years. I am 18. I do not know a life without diabetes. This is both a blessing and a curse, depending on which day you ask me. :-)
Today was a site change day. Ok, if you want to get technical, last night was site change day, but I didn't do it. Naughty me. I had enough insulin and the site was working fine, so sue me! On a good day, and site change will take me 10 minutes or less. Today, was NOT a good day. It started with lots of air bubbles in the catridge that would not leave. I spent over 10 minutes messing around with it before I was satisfied. Everything went smoothly until I went to put the site in. I've been using my arms lately. After almost 6 years of pumping exclusively in the stomach, it needed a break, so I've been using my arms, and taking advantage of the cold weather and long sleeves to hide the sites. I decided to be slightly adventurous and try the back of my arms. I use quick-sets, 6mm. To put the set in using the quick-serter, you have to press 2 little white buttons at the same time. This was one of those days that they did NOT want to release at the same time. Finally, the site goes in. This is accompanied by a flash of pain that did not leave. Great. Do I leave it in, and suffer from potential pain and a high blood sugar, or take it out? Like I almost always do, I leave it in. The pains relieves slightly, and I make a note of the time so I can check my blood sugar in an hour. I put away all of my site change things and start to hall out homework. I reach down my sleeve to adjust the tubing, and I feel something sticky. This is not good. I feel around a little more, and feel the canula. (#&$!!! I quickly remove my sleeve to see blood and a pump site just barely hanging one. Great, just great. I really didn't want to do homework anyway! What better to do than do yet another site change! As I grab my supplies, I realize I have only 1 site left with me. I am not in the dorm this weekend, and I thought I had brought more than enough supplies. I thought wrong. My last good site is in, and it better be a good one, or I'm back on shots for the rest of the weekend. That would be a nightmare at this point. I'm out of practice with shots in the first place, but I'm also on steroids for a lung illness, which has dramatically increased my insulin needs.
I hate changing my pump site today. Most days, it really doesn't bother me. Sure, it's an annoyance, but it's annoyance that allows me great freedom and good health. But today, I hate it. I hate that I have to rely on this stupid machine with it's tubing and tapes and cartidges. In short, I WANT MY CURE!
I hope my first attempt at a blogger post wasn't a complete failure.
I ask a favor of anyone reading this: Could you please comment? Until I know how this goes, I won't be actively telling anyone about it, but I would like to know if anyone happens to stumble across it! Thanks so much!