Guardian, take two

I really wanted to post on this a long time ago, but sometimes life just gets in the way.
I picked up the Guardian and some sensors on December 16, with not a lot of expectations. I am happy to say it surpassed every one of my expectations.
It was not dead on, but I no longer expected it to be. It DID catch highs and lows. I did see some trends. I realized I really need to change my habit of bolusing during or after meals. It is just unfair to expect the insulin to "catch up" and compete with the food spikes when the food has such a head start.

I really think the Guardian is a great tool. I really want it back. It caught one low in the middle of the night before I woke up, and that is exactly what I wanted it to do. I was sad, rather than relieved like I was last time, to return the unit after a month.

I don’t know the cause of my last poor experience with the Guardian. The only thing I can figure is that I got some bad sensors. Absolutely everything else stayed exactly the same. It makes me happy and give me hope for the future that I had a successful experience the second time around. I loved having that data. I value the reassurance when I start to feel funny I could look and see where I was and in what direction I was heading. Nothing could replace the feeling it gave me going into surgery having it at my side (more on this later).

I am currently flirting with the idea of trying to pursue insurance coverage. I don't know if I am up for the fight or not. My insurance company won't cover more than 200 test strips a month, I kind of doubt they would pay for something as progressive as a CGMS. I'd love to hear of users of CGMS- do you pay for it out of pocket, or did you get insurance to cough it up?

If I never hear the word "diabetes" again, it will be too soon

I am sick and tired about hearing about diabetes. Why then, some might ask, am I writing about this in a diabetes blog that is part of a whole right of diabetes blogs? Because it is not the OC that I am sick of. Strangly enough, the OC is one of my escapes.
I am sick of hearing about diabetes in my classes. Every single day diabetes comes up. Whether it be as an example of how to teach a client or risk factors for one condition or another- it comes up. I am sick of hearing about how people with diabetes have to drastically change their diet. How they must exercise daily to lower their blood sugar. How having diabetes puts them at risk for every fricking condition under the sun. How they all have bad feeling in their feet. How if they do not control their sugars by taking their pills, following their strict diet and exercising daily they might have to use insulin! AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!
If I'm lucky- the words "type two" come up, but rarely. I'm sick of fighting the battle. At first, it was funny. Me and a couple of friends kept a tally to see how many classes it DIDN"T come up in. I'm past the stage of it being funny. Now I'm sick of it. There ARE other chronic conditions out there that people have to adapt their lifestyle for. I do not have to follow a special diet. I have better feeling in my feet than my endocrinologist (according to him). I do not not have a I pump and test up to 10 times a day because I'm so out of control, I do it to be IN control!
I now understand WHY medical professionals have such a jaded view of living with type 1 diabetes. Because this stuff is ramed down their throats every. single. day. I might have a little more patience the next time I deal with an ignorant nurse- and throw in a little education.

Clinical

Today was one of those nightmarish days. I have clinical rotations at the hospitals on Mondays and Tuesdays. Today was my first day back after surgery. I was not on top of my game.
I do not usually tell the nurse I'm working with that I'm diabetic. It is generally unnecessary information, and a lot of people in the medical field have preconceived notions about diabetes that I just do not need to deal with. I generally manage my blood sugars pretty well during clincals, so it's not an issue.
Today, however, I did not manage well at all. I went from an astounding(not in a good way!) 426 to 59. Within 2 hours. Right around 3pm I started feeling thirsty, and since it had been a few hours since I had last checked, I thought, why not- my lunch bolus could be a little off. I washed my hands, pricked my finger and waited. And waited. And waited. As Cozmonitor users will know, the longer it takes to get a results, the higher it is. My anxiety level rose with each passing second. I almost gasped out loud when I saw the result. As soon as I saw it, I realized I had no backup supplies with me. It would be another 4 hours before I could get insulin if my site was bad. I took an astronomically large bolus and prayed for the best. 2 hours later, I was 59. I guess the site worked after all. I will be putting extra supplies in my bag, and hope that tomorrow is a better day.

time flies

I didn't mean to be gone this long, but I think very rarely do people plan their blogging absences. It started out with the craziness of finishing up a semester. It continued with the holiday busyness. Then it had been so long that I thought I'd just wait until I got back to school and high speed internet. Then came the appendicitis, the surgery, and the hospital stay. Finally, catching up with missed classes. All that brings me here, with my return to blogging. I am hopelessly behind on reading, and definitely on commenting. I opened my feeds of the blogs I read to find way over a hundred unread posts. I just deleted them all. There is no way I'd ever catch up. I hope to start posting more. I'm setting a goal for myself of once a week. I know that's not a lot, but that's the goal. There are so many things I want to tell you all about. My first alcoholic drink. My experience with surgery. My second experience with the Guardian. My second alcoholic drink. Hopefully, I'll post about those things with time.
I'm here to say I'm back. I hope to see you around to DOC.

Because final exams are kicking my butt

One. More. Final. Not sure I can make it. Needed a break.

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?
Wrapping paper. It's so much more fun.

2. Real tree or artificial?
REAL!!! I have a skin allergy to them and it's pretty funny to watch my and my mom decorating the tree with gloves. I will not give up my real tree.

3. When do you put up the tree?
Whenever I move home from school.
4. When do you take the tree down?
Sometime around new years. I wait as long as possible.
5. Do you like eggnog?
Not really.
6. Favorite gift received as a child?
When I was about 8 I got an American girl doll (Samantha) and thought I was in heavy. I insisted on having it in our family Christmas picture that year.
7. Do you have a nativity scene?
Yes- kind of. It's one of those things that is a puzzle but the pieces are Mary, Joseph, Jesus, etc. My grandpa made it.

8. Hardest person to buy for?
My sister in law. We have different tastes, as much as I love her.

9. Easiest person to buy for?
Generally, my mother.
10. Worst Christmas gift you ever received?
A box of doll clothes from an extended family member when I was 15.
11. Mail or email Christmas cards?
Neither.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie?
For the classics- Rudolph, the Red-Nosed Reindeer. For recent- The Polar Express

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas?
Depends on how on top of it I am. Usually sometime in December. This year? I am DONE! It is almost a miracle.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present?
Noooooo....never......

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas?
These white chocolate bars. I can't describe them, but they are awesome.

16. Clear lights or colored on the tree?
Colored.
17. Favorite Christmas song?
I refuse to pick one.
18. Travel for Christmas or stay home?
Stay Home. This is the first year I'm traveling somewhere, and I'm trying to be OK with it.

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeers?
Yes.

20. Angel on the tree top or a star?
Angel

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning?
Christmas afternoon, actually. After Christmas morning church service and Christmas dinner.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of year?
Dealing with cranky people in crowded stores.

23. What I love most about Christmas?
EVERYTHING!! I LOVE Christmas. Favorite time of the year. The food, the people, the music, the food, pretty much everything.

15 days

In 15 days, I turn 21.
I am quite excited about this. I am generally a rule follower, and I have not had any drinks before now. A sip here and there, yes, but other than that, I am not a drinker. That will not change much when I turn 21, but it will change somewhat. I want to be able to order a drink when I go out with friends. Maybe get a little tipsy once. I've seen plenty of stupid drunk people (I am in college after all) and I am not interested in being one of them. I'm being honest here- I am going to drink. I am not going to be stupid. All of my friends know I am diabetic, and almost all of them know how to take care of me.

In keeping with the not being stupid theme, I want to know how the OC handles alcohol. How do you bolus? How does it usually affect you? Any other drinking tips? (Now isn't THAT a strange sentence!)

I am not going to let diabetes take away a drink or two. I'd appreciate any tips anyone has. If for some reason you don't want to post as a comment, feel free to email me at jenjen6868@juno.com. Thanks in advance!

Meme

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
Nope. I do share my mother’s middle name.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? Yesterday. I did something stupid that messed up my whole night and seriously stressed me out.

3. Do you like your handwriting? NO! In elementary school, I was actually in a special class b/c it was so bad. It did not improve.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Ham

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? No. I have fun with my niece and nephew. Kids are still a looong way off for me.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I have no idea. I often wonder this, and I have no idea.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Depends on who I am around.

8. Do you still have your tonsils? Yes.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? No! Not a fan of heights.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Right now, honey nut cherrioes. Lucky Charms is my guilty pleasure, but I almost never eat it for obvious reasons.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Never. I don’t untie then when I put them on either. It is a bad habit that I can’t stop.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? No. I’m mentally strong during crisis, but that’s about it.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Chocolate. If there are peanut butter cups involved, I’m in heaven.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Their clothes. The problem is, I focus on that, and I remember their clothes, not the face. The next time I meet them, I’m clueless because they have changed their clothes!

15. RED OR PINK? Pink.

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? No question about it, My weight.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? As far as deceased, my maternal grandfather. Other than that, a friend who is studying in Africa for a semester.

18. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Blue jeans and purple slippers. 

No 19, and it’s one of my favorite numbers!

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Some cashews

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The TV (which is weird, because I almost never watch TV)

22. IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Midnight blue

23. FAVORITE SMELLS? vanilla

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? A classmate

25. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Basketball. But only in person.

26. HAIR COLOR? I consider it blond, but in the last week two people have called it brown, so I guess blonde/brown

27. EYE COLOR? Blue.

28 .Do you wear contacts? Yes

29.FAVORITE FOOD? Hmmm. Probably mashed potatoes

30. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings. I’m a sucker for that kind of thing.

31. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Fiddler on the roof, oddly enough.

32 WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Brown and pink

33. SUMMER OR WINTER? Winter. I love snow. It snowed for the first time today, and I was THRILLED.

34. HUGS OR KISSES? Hugs.

35. FAVORITE DESSERT? Peanut butter pie.

36. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Weird pink and orange cirles. It was the only one that didn’t have puppies or cats on it when I bought one, and I’m too cheap to buy a new one.

37. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? Didn’t watch TV last night.

38. FAVORITE SOUND? My niece laughing. You can’t get any better than a child laughing.

39. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Beatles.

40. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Colorado

41. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Nope.

A short Guardian review

I've had a couple of requests for a review on my experience with the Guardian, so I thought I'd give you a quick run down.
Positives:
* This must go first because it seems most important. My A1c dropped from 7.4 to 6.8 in the month I wore the unit. I was shocked. This is my lowest Aic in my lifetime, except maybe the time when I wasn't diabetic :-). I think the increased awareness of postprandials was a large part of the drop.
* I like the size and weight of the receiver. It wasn't too annoying to carry it and my pump. I do think the weight and possibly the size would change with a pump and CGMS in one.
*The 3,6 and 12 hour graphs. The 24 hour was too small to be of any use. The others were helpful for seeing trends for that day.
* The sensor was not as big and bulky as I thought it would be. It did not bother me 85% of the time.
*The fact that the software was online, so I was not tied to one computer all the time.
*For the most part, I was happy with the receiving range. It did seem to vary and I'm not sure why. I found most of the time I could set the receiver on my bed and walk around my dorm room with no problems.

Negatives:
* I've written several times before about the accuracy issues I had before. I won't go into too much details again, especially since I think there might have been extenuating circumstances (see below). The highlights include missing almost all lows (it caught 2 in a month. I assure you I had more than 2 lows that month), not seeing highs as high as they actually were and random times where it was 150 points or more off.
* I was not happy with the support I received from Minimed. In several cases they refused to answer my questions. Not the impression you want to leave on a potential customer.
* I wish it would show more than just the current day without having to download it to a computer.
*Speaking of downloading- they seriously need a new cable! I could not use my laptop to upload data because it did not have a serial port. Quick annoying.
*Finding sites for the senor and my pump sites did start to get a little tricky. The sensor sites healed slower than a usual pump site. I could not really use the pump and the CGMS on the same side, so it did not take long to run out of real estate. I was not brave enough to try the sensors on areas of my body other than my abdomen.
* The sensors just shut off at the end of the 72 hour period with no warning what so ever. I found this annoying. I have enough things to remember thank you very much.
*There were times the sensor did bother me. The biggest of these were during exercise. There is nothing holding the transmitter portion to the body. When I exercised and when I showered it seemed to flop around a lot.

Those were the things that stick out in my mind. That being said, I am going on another trial in a few weeks. I met with the nurse educator who runs the program at my endo's office when I returned the unit and we sat down and talked. She was upset that I did not get the support I needed from Minimed, and wanted to try and correct the situation. She contacted the rep for the area, and he wanted the days and I times I called and said he was going to look into it. He also wanted me to try it again if I was willing. This time I have his number to call with problems, so hopefully I can problem solve with him and have a truly good experience. I'll keep you updated!

I've been tagged

The rules:
Link the person who tagged you, Sandra and Chris
Post these rules on your blog.
List seven random and/or weird facts about yourself.
Tag seven random people at the end of your post.
The last rule that seems to be optional depending on who you ask is to put a comment on the people you've tagged blogs so they know they have been tagged.
My Seven:
1. I am a farm girl, born and raised. Yes, complete with John Deere tractors. No, I don't have any cows/horses/pigs. It's not that kind of farm.
2. As I child, I could do word search puzzles before I could read. There was one in the children's bulletin one Sunday, my mom told me how to do it, I did the whole thing, and loved to do them every since.
3. I used a pacifier until I started preschool. I was almost weaned off of it when I was diagnosed, and my mom didn't have to heart to take it away from me at the hospital. I finally got rid of it one summer. I left it outside and my mom told me it was lost. She hid it in a drawn just in case something happened and I went back into the hospital. We found it 5 years later when we moved.
4. I had the nickname of "fer-fer" for the longest time. When I was learning to talk, I couldn't pronounce the "j" in my name, so I just said "fer" and my relatives never let it go.
5. I've never seen the ocean. I hope to someday, but have no plans right now.
6. I went to the Global Medical Missions Health Conference last weekend, and it has me seriously thinking about doing some sort of overseas medical missions after graduation. Which incidentally scares the living daylights out of me.
7. I am going to try the Guardian CGMS again next month. I promise I'll talk about my last experience...in my spare time.
I honestly could not find 7 people who had not been tagged, so I tag all the lurkers. Put your answers on the comments on my or another blog. And you have a blog and you haven't been tagged and I missed it, then I tag you!

World Diabetes Day

When I see the pictures of all the things that happened around the world today all in the name of diabetes, it makes my heart happy. I would have loved to be a part of them, but it just wasn't possible. I am so glad for such an awesome event that raises awareness. I saw several news stories on it already, and I'm sure there will be many more to come.
Happy World Diabetes Day!

What's wrong with this picture?

I got a bag of candy the other day (What? A diabetic bought chocolate? Tsk) and as soon as I unwrapped it, I wondered what kind of message the Hersey's corporation was trying to send me....


and then later, this one.


Maybe I'll have to rethink my choices of candy....

Shhhh!!

Shhh...Don't tell anyone, but my Guardian has caught three lows in the past two days!
But I did not say it out loud, and writing it will not jinx it.

I've thought over and over again about this post, and what I should say.
A brief rundown of the events since my last post. At Allison's suggestion and my desperation, I put in new sensor in on Sunday, the 7th. I was hoping to make each sensor last about a week or so, because I had 4 sensors and a month to use them. That sensor seemed to do alright for a day or so, but my blood sugars were also pretty decent. Wednesday, I restarted the sensor, and got another decent day out of it. On Thursday however, everything fell apart. I got a "cal error" at lunch. It showed me in the high 200s, when I knew I was just fine. I had been keeping a close eye on my blood sugar, to see if an ever challenging bagel breakfast bolus was working like it should. I had been consistently clocking in at 100 to 120. Maybe I should haven't have calibrated then, but I was frustrated at it's inaccuracy. Later that day, in a major national exam, the Guardian just went crazy. First, it told me a high glucose was predicted. Whatever, I felt fine, and I was in the middle of this very important exam. Not 15 minutes later, "Fall Rate." This is supposed to mean my blood sugar is falling more than 3mg/dL. Again, I ignored it again. Not 5 minutes later, "Rise Rate." By this point, I was ready to throw the thing out the window. I wasn't supposed to have any electronic devices in the room. I took my chances, and brought the Guardian. Then, I was forced to check it every 5 minutes because it kept alerting. When I got done with the exam (which I passed with flying colors, despite the annoying interruptions) I placed another annoying phone call to Minimed, who did not even want to help me, saying I should contact my doctors office. Finally, she told me I should re-calibrate when I was positive my blood sugars were perfectly level. I felt like telling her- look, I'm diabetic, if I knew when my blood sugars were going to be perfectly level, I wouldn't need technology like the Guardian! She said if I wanted to be completely sure it was back in line with my blood glucose, to restart the sensor. That's what I did. All Thursday night, it alarmed like crazy. First high alarms, then low alarms, all of which were disproved by a fingerstick. After a very frustrating, sleepless night, I tore the sensor out and put the receiver back in the box. I had enough. I kept it off all weekend, while I wrestled with what to do. My ideas ranged from putting it back on, to driving it back to the doctor's office 3 weeks early and telling them never to give it to anyone else. Calling Minimed for help is no longer an option. I've had three unhelpful conversations with them, most ending with them swearing their product is practically flawless, and I must be doing something wrong. Granted, they can't tell me what that is, but it is not their problem. They seem to have a mental barrier to the fact that I did not buy the unit, that I'm only borrowing it. Sorry for the tangent, back to reality.
Sunday, the 14th, I decided to give it another shot. I was going to make sure there was no reason for error. I put the sensor it 4 hours after lunch, with no additional food or insulin. Chances were, my blood sugars were not going far. I waited the 2 hour warm up period, still eating nothing, and taking no insulin. I waited another 45 minutes after the first calibration before I ate anything and took any insulin. I am only calibrating the recommended 2 times a day(I had been doing 3), first time in the morning, after fasting, and now in the evening, which I have also made a fasting time of day to prevent any possible errors. I hate that I am modifying my life to appease a piece of equipment that is supposed to help me. The accuracy has improved minimally. If I am between 80 and 150, it is very close, almost always within the 20% guideline. As soon and I drop out of that range however, the Guardian is way, way off. I realize that even fingersticks are more accurate with normal numbers, but I am talking about a difference of at least 100 points. It still has not caught an actual low. Most of the time, it showed me holding steady in the 80-90 range, while my blood sugar is in the 50's. I have decided to get over my disappointment and move on. The biggest reason I wanted to borrow the Guardian is to get my basals nailed down really well. To do that, my blood sugars should be within the 80 to 150 range anyway. I will continue to monitor my blood sugars like I normally would (not the 20 or so times I did for several days trying to figure out what the heck was going on with the Guardian) and give up on the dream that this equipment could help me prevent highs and lows. Someday maybe it will get there, but it has not arrived for me. Not yet anyway.

Not Impressed

I am on day 4 of the Guardian, and I'm not going to lie, I'm disappointed. We all know there are peaks and valleys in our blood sugars. I wish they didn't happen, and I try and prevent them, but usually when I graph out my blood sugars there they are, the hills and valleys of highs and lows. With the Guardian, there are no hills or valleys, there are only ant hills and minor puddles. It has only caught one low blood sugar, and never shows me as high as my blood says I am. With lows, it might say I go down to 82 or so, not the 50's I'm actually experiencing. The Guardian might show I'm up to 200, but a finger stick shows I'm actually 260. Last night, I went down to 60, and the Guardian showed me holding steadily at 150. I'm sorry, but that is a huge, unacceptable difference. The first full day I had the Guardian, I was ready to believe every number it showed me. I just did a minimum number of blood sugar checks before meals, and fully thought that my blood sugars really were that amazing, almost never straying outside of the 80 to 120 range. Now I am not that sure. I am still checking my blood sugar 8 to 10 times a day. I hope as time goes on that maybe I find out why it shows such differences, but for now, I just don't trust it. I am greatly disappointed in this piece of equipment. I thought this was the next greatest, life changing piece of equipment. I thought maybe it would be worth fighting the insurance company for coverage, but for now I think it would be a waste of time.

19 Years

Nineteen years ago today, I was diagnosed with diabetes.
Today, I feel very diabetic. That might sound strange to some. There are some days when diabetes sinks into the background and routines take over. Today though it is on the forefront of my mind. On my left side, I wear my Cozmo and Quick-set, almost silently delivering insulin. On the right, the Guardian RT and mini-link transmitter, attempting to tell me if the pump is giving me the right amount if insulin. These are part of my life now and they are reminders of what I need to do to survive and thrive.
I’ve thought a lot lately how diabetes has altered my life, and it is something that I can not honestly answer. It is such a part of me, that I cannot image what life would be like if I had never gotten this disease. Has it made me more sympathetic? Maybe. More cautious? Perhaps. Less spontaneous? Probably. But this is who I am now. I am a college student. I am a Christian. I am a daughter and an aunt. I am also a diabetic. That’s just the way it is.
I am not celebrating today, and I’m not mourning it either. It’s just another day in my life. A day like the past 6,935 that happens to include insulin, blood sugar checks and carbohydrate counting.

First Impressions

I am officially hooked up to a Guardian Real Time System. They gave me a whole new setup, so I felt like I was getting it "for real" and that I didn't have to give it back in a month. I am unsure about my feelings of it yet. It is too soon, and I've had too many issues. From the beginning:
One of my biggest fears was wearing and inserting the sensor. I was expecting the insertion of the sensor to hurt like &^*$ because it went in at an angle (angled sites and I have a bad history) and then the nurse offered me ice, saying most everyone used it. After about a minute of sitting there with the ice on my stomach, and getting more nervous by the second, I just went for it. I did not hurt a bit. It takes a little bit of work to get the inserter off of the site, and it is a little nerve wracking. With a pump site, you mess it up, and it's not that big of a deal. With a sensor, it's like flushing twenty dollar bills down the toilet. Overall, a lot easier than I thought. It actually hurt less than my pump sites.
After my training was done, they sent me on my way, with the instruction to do a 2 hour calibration check before the system would actually start working. Not 15 minutes down the road, I got a "sensor error" alert. Not exactly what I wanted to see. After pouring through the manual, I finally found out that one of those alerts is really no big deal, but multiple alerts aren't so great. Ok, I'm good to go. I thought. Until 20 minutes later, when I got the same alert. Soo I called the Minimed people, who had me restart the 2 hour start up period. So 5 hours after my initial appointment, I was finally getting readings. For a few hours, it went pretty well. I checked the number on the screen every 15 minutes or so, just for the joy of it. I felt like it was fairly accurate, until about half an hour ago, when I could feel myself falling. But the graph stayed steady. As I was walking back to my room from a friends house, I became more and more sure that I was dropping. But the Guardian did not agree. I know it takes some time to catch up with rapidly changing numbers, but I felt like I was dropping for a good half an hour. I checked, and my meter said 75. Not exactly an emergency, but not the 188 the Guardian claimed. Here's where I made my first big mistake: I plugged that number into the Guardian. Bad move. It needs calibration numbers that are not rapidly changing. After it thought for a good long while, I got a "cal error." So I'm not getting any data now, and I'm in the waiting game for my blood sugar to even out so I can calibrate it again. I'm hoping it becomes more accurate as time goes on, and I learn how to best take advantage of this technology.

I did it

I participated in the JDRF walk. Not the one I normally go to, but one that took place several weeks later. It was actually a lot of fun. There were a lot more people at this walk, and it was a lot more upbeat. They had face painting and a lot of things my niece would love. The walk was thru the heart of downtown, and I got to see a lot of things that I never would have seen before. Although I did not raise a lot of money, I'm really glad I ended up doing it, even if it was a last minute affair.
This week is a pretty significant D week. Tomorrow I get my temporary Guardian CGMS. I want to love it, but I'm trying to be realistic and realize that there will probably be times when I will hate it.
Wednesday will be my diagnosis anniversary. I will have been living with this disease for 19 years.
Needless to say, this will be a trying week for me. Look for frequent updates.

My endo appointment was somewhat productive. My A1c was 7.1. Last time was 7.0. I've been shooting for under 7%, and I'm just not there yet. We fiddled with some basal rates, and changed some insulin to carb rations. I'm still working on it, and it continues to be a struggle, that to be honest, I don't always feel like fighting.
I still don't have my lab work back, meaning I still don't know if my thyroid is working normally, or anything else that they were checking. I'm a little frustrated, although I figure if it has taken this long to get back to me, they must be normal.
Next week, I take one very large, nerve-wracking step. I go on a trial run of Minimed's Guardian CGMS. My doctor's office has a unit that they lend out for a month or so at a time. My doctor really pushed me to try it, saying that he would be more than willing to help me fight my insurance company if it was something I was interested in. I am still not that sold on the idea of wearing two different sites on my body. But then, there are those nights that I wake up at 36mg/dL and terrified, that make me think it would be more than worth it. I think the warranty on my Cozmo runs out next summer, so maybe this will be one of the deciding factors for it I stick with them, or look at a Minimed again. Although I've had MAJOR issues with Minimed, the technology that they are offering right now is ahead of that of Cozmo. Believe me, it pains me to say that.
So as of next week, I'll be hooked up to 2 machines 24/7. I'll be sure to tell you what I think. Any advice?

This n' That

*I went on JDRF's website today because I was curious when the local Walk was taking place, since I hadn't received any information. I was shocked to find out its next weekend. Now I'm in a pickle. I've done the walk for 10 years. It is always a lot of work, and always seems anticlimactic in some way. But yet, I feel hypocritical if I don't participate. I once again have a lot going on this semester, and writing a heartfelt fundraising letter just doesn't sound that appealing.
*I have an endo appointment on Monday that I feel unprepared for, but then again, I rarely feel fully prepared. I always swear that I'm going to test all of my basals at least twice and test my correction factor, but it never happens.
*I had drawn Wednesday to test my thyroid function and a bunch of other things. Usually it is just a routine test, but this time I have reason to believe there might be something going on. Last time I had it checked, the level jump quite a bit, but was still normal, and I have some vague symptoms that could be attributed to hypothyroidism. Or just as easily not. We shall see.
* I am quitting my job tomorrow. I am incredibly nervous, but I know it is the right decision. There is just no way I can keep my sanity with a class load of 17 credits and working 20 hours a week. Sorry, not on top of my clinical rotations and everything else. It was a great experience that I would have liked to continue. But like my brother said, I'll have plenty of time to work after I graduate.
*I went to ColdStone tonight with some friends, and had the most delightful, sinful bowl of ice cream called Peanut Butter Perfection. It was heavenly. My blood sugar 2hours postprandial? 105. Yessssss!
*Not everything is going that well, however. I have Kevin's new blood sugar log, which I love. The new pie chart is awesome, but it is telling me things I don't want to see. Like the fact that I'm "in range" only 49% of the time. The rest being mostly high (41%). I do not like this. At all. For now, I'm just logging and hoping my endo will fix it for me.

Why don't they understand?

I picked up more insulin at the pharmacy the other day. More accurately, I went to the pharmacy Monday, Thursday and Friday to get more insulin. Getting prescriptions from them is always an adventure, invariably they will only bill one insurance company, or will have some other redundant question. This time, I chose to go through the drive thru, which turned out to be a wise choice. I told them my name, and watched as they got the prescription bag, and picked up a bottle of insulin OFF THE COUNTER, put it in my bag, and handed it to me. For a split second, I debated what to do. I know that bottle wasn't sitting on the counter because they just got done putting the label on the box, I called it in the day before, to be sure it would be ready by the time I got to the pharmacy. I had no idea how long that bottle of life sustaining, refrigeration required bottle of medication had been sitting on the counter. I decided I couldn't keep silent. I don't always go through all three bottles of insulin in a month, what happens when they sit in my refrigerator longer than that? Who can guarantee that they will be good until the date on the box? What's the point of even putting a expiration date on the box when the pharmacy blatantly ignores the instructions? As the technician handed me the bag I said, "why wasn't this refrigerated?" His answer? "It doesn't need to be refrigerated if you use it within a month." I proceeded to briefly argue with him, before deciding that even though his whole occupation revolves around medications, he apparently didn't understand how important it is that these medications work exactly as they are supposed to. I drove off feeling frustrated that yet another medical professional had failed me. I am now making the policy that when I pick up my insulin, I either need to see them take it out of the refrigerator, or it needs to be cool to the touch. I don't care it that makes me an annoying patient, I need to know my insulin is safe.
Oh, the other thing that frustrated me? They only had one bottle of Humalog insulin available in the whole pharmacy! They were OUT of insulin. I would have to return Wednesday to get the rest of my prescription. I gave them an extra day for good measure, and went back Thursday, only to be told it still wasn't ready, forcing me to make another trip back on Friday. If this pharmacy wasn't my only option in pretty much the whole state, I would switch, but I think I'm going to find these problems everywhere.