Blogger hates me

I tried to respond to everyone's comments on my last post, but blogger won't let me comment on my own page, so I'm posting them here.
Chrissie, I do something very similar when I get leg cramps. I alternate from pointing my toes to pointing my heel. It does help, although very painful.
Everyone who suggested bananas for more potassium: Sadly, I can't stand bananas. OJ is supposed to be a decent source too, so I'll try that.
Minnesota Nice: When you had low potassium levels, how often did you get leg cramps?
Virginia: I'll have to check emer-gen-c out next time I get to the store.

Now for a major time waster stolen from facebook.

A bit of everything survey
Basics Name:Jen
Age: 20
Sex: female
Hair color: Blond
Eye color: Blue
Zodiac sign: Capricorn
Heritage/nationality: Dutch mostly
Named after: No one
People you live with: 3 amazing girls!
Favorites
Color: Blue
Band: Right now, I'm on am Emerson Drive kick ( don't hate me for being a country fan)
TV Show: Grey's Anatomy- all the way!
Video Game: It's been YEARS since I've played a video game
Movie: Hmmmmm... Pirates of the Caribbean
Food: Chocolate ice cream
Room in the house:Um, my dorm? it's only one room!
Flower: Gerber Daisies
Animal: Dog
Sport: Basketball
Pizza Topping: Just cheese!
Season: Fall, although I'm a big fan of the 70's we've been having
Shampoo: Don't have one. I need to get a different brand.
Hairspray: Don't use it
CD: Don't have one
Gum: Orbit
Restaurant: Uno's! Best pizza ever!
Late night activity: Facebook/reading blogs. Or lately, finishing homework
Holiday: Christmas
Number: 22
Candy: It's a tie between Kit-Kat and Peanut Butter cups
Song: Depends on my mood
Starbucks beverage: I have NEVER been to a Starbucks. I'm loyal to the local coffee shop.
Are you for or Against...
Prostitution: Against
Drunk Driving: Against. If you want to get drunk, fine with me, but please don't be stupid enough to drive and kill someone.
Legalizing Drugs: Mostly against
Death Penalty: Undecided
Premarital sex: Against
War: Wow, that's a whole can of worms....
Hippies: Um....For??
Clothes on dogs: Against
School Uniforms: Mostly Against
Public Schools: Indifferent
Spam: Against- who really wants spam?
Slavery: Against
Interracial Relationships: For
Arranged Marriages: Against
Republicans: For
Jesus: For
Gun control: Mostly Against.
Organic Farming: Against. Another can of worms, I know.
Britney Spears: I'd be happy if I didn't have to hear about her anymore!
Curfews: For who?
Tommy Hilfiger: I'm not a name brand person. I'm a Target girl
The Atkins Diet: Against.
This or That
Jello or Pudding: Pudding. I've hated Jello for a loooong time.
AIM or MSN: AIM
Hotmail or Yahoo: Hotmail
Carpet or hardwood: Carpet
Cats or Dogs: Dogs
Fish or mice: Fish?
Wine or beer: Neither
Abercrombie or Hot Topic: Again, not a name brand person.
Cake or pie: Pie
Golf or Poker: Poker
Shower or bath: Shower
Independent Films or Big Company Films:Big Films.
Spoons or Forks: Spoons
Do you...
Drink diet pop: When I actually drink pop, which is like 2x/year
Eat a lot of junk food: Sadly, yes
Watch soap operas: Nope.
Watch CSI: Not really
Wear make up: Yes
Take naps: When I need to catch up. They are how I am surviving college
Own a cell phone: Yes
Have a job: Yes
When was the last time you Cursed: Today most likely
Had sex: Never
Went to the mall: Wednesday
Ate:Lunch
Went into a chat room: Forever ago
Drank alcohol: Never
Went bowling: The beginning of the year
Had a sleep over: We have random people sleeping in our room sometimes, does that count?
Got arrested: Ha ha. Never
Went to the movies: It's been a while....Whenever Music and Lyrics came out.
Told someone a secret: I have no idea
Gave someone a gift: A friends birthday in January
Had a gift given to you: Probably my birthday
Brushed your teeth: After lunch
Died your hair: Never
Gave advice: Not long ago

Wow...That wasted a good amount of time. I tag anyone who is procrastinating.
I hope to post soon about my Spring break.

My, my. How time flies. I've been busy, busy, busy with classes. Today started my Spring Break, and I am so ready for it. I plan on sleeping and catching up on work. Doesn't that sound like a blast?
I also just got done with a month long ban on using stomach sites. I decided it needed a break, and I really needed to explore my other options, so I gave myself a month to do it. It turned out to be a really good experience. I used my thighs almost the entire time. I am now a big fan of them. I used to get a burning sensation when I delivered insulin in my thighs, but now it is only with an especially large bolus. I think I'm going to try and work them into a regular rotation. Even though the month was up, I wasn't in a hurry to go back to my stomach. I usually alternate between one site of my stomach to the other, but maybe now I'll do right leg, right stomach, left stomach, left leg. It would probably be good for the sites.
I had a weird night last night. I sometimes get cramps in my legs (aka Charlie horses). I seem to get them really, really bad. I have to get out of bed and keep my leg moving( even through the excruciating pain) or my calf gets so tight I can't walk the next morning. Sometimes they only last a minute, others have lasted close to half an hour. I hate them with a passion. I hate having them at school even more, because I usually make quite a bit of noise when I get them, and I don't want to wake up my roommate. I tried and tried to find a cause, but never could pin point one. I had an idea that they were usually on days when I walked a lot more than usual, and had a very high blood sugar that day. Well, last night did not fit that scenario. I had my first leg cramp of the semester. Lucky for me, I was also low. I was in pain, and had to get out of bed to work out the cramp, but I was also uncoordinated from sleep and the low. It was not a pretty sight, and I was not happy. I do not like getting up at 3:00am (who does?) and waking up in pain and low was a bad combination. Now, I'm wondering if I should change my idea of what is causing leg cramps. Although it is a fairly isolated incident, I have had lows and leg cramps at the same time before. Now, I'm wondering if this should be a new symptom. I do not want to add "leg cramps" to the list of symptoms of my lows that I have to recite every time I go to my endo. Does anyone else get these cramps in their calves? Do they correspond with highs or lows? This is probably just an isolated incident that has me over analyzing, but it sure was a strange experience!

Memories

I’ve been thinking about Penny’s post a while ago titled Because I have to. It made me think about my mom, and my experience with those kinds of lows. I’ve lain in my mom’s lap while she stroked my head willing me to feel better. There were times I cried. There were times I would fall back asleep. I have faint memories of a time I couldn’t communicate because of a bad low. My parents filled in the details. I woke up and walked downstairs. I didn’t say anything, just sat down and started watching TV. I faintly remember my mom shaking my shoulders trying to get me to concentrate and tell her where my meter was. The next thing I remember I was drinking juice and I had a blood stain on my finger. That incident really shook me because I didn’t have any memory of walking downstairs, and my mom checked my blood sugar. At that point my mom hadn’t checked me in years. I knew I was low, but I couldn't tell the person who wanted to help me most. I remember lots of lows, sitting in the kitchen drinking a small glass of apple juice and a graham cracker. Always the same snack and always with my mom. She would turn on the living room light so the light wouldn’t wake up too much. Even now, the first thing I use to treat a low are those little glasses of apple juice. Even now that I treat lows by myself, when I go downstairs to the kitchen to treat I know she is upstairs waiting for me to return. Sometimes she comes down to check on me, and sometimes she’ll ask me if I’m ok when she hears me coming back up the stairs. No matter what, she’ll ask me the next morning if I had a rough night. I really hated those nighttime lows, and still do, but I treasure the memories of her taking care of me. Thanks Mom.

When did I become an angry person?

First off, thanks to everyone who left ideas for me. I really appreciate them.
I apologize in advance for the following post. It is being written in the heat of a moment, after a long day with very little sleep.

I'm sitting here, trying to study for an exam, thinking over all the times today, and over the last few days that I've been really angry. I am not an angry person normally, but lately, I have become one.
I went to my endo Tuesday. I was expected a rise in my A1c because I am currently in the semester from Hell (I don't swear. Practically never, and this semester is totally worthy of that description.) I had no basal tests. No insulin to carb ratio tests. No 2am tests. Nothing. I was angry at myself, but I knew I just did not have the time or energy to skip meals. It just wasn't happening. My A1c? 7.1. That's down. That's a really good number. But you know what? I was mad. I was actually MAD that it went down, and I did nothing. At all. It just decided to go down. I should not be angry about this, but I am.
My presentation to my Pharmacology study group was tonight. I was nervous. I had to balance the information and the time. As I'm going through the require information, I kept giving things that were not highlighted in the professors notes, but will be really important in the practical setting. My presentation partner kept saying, "but we don't need to know this! This isn't going to be on the exam!" I had to really hold my tongue. I kept a level head, but it was hard. After giving the required information, I had a sheet with some bullet points that I titled "what every type one diabetic wants you to know." I talked about some of the misconceptions, and included most of your suggestions. I thought it went fairly well considering how nervous I was. Later, after the group meeting, I saw one of my group members, and she mentions to my friend that I went "on a rampage" during our meeting. I was dumbfounded. I did not raise my voice. I simply told them what I thought they should know. I put it in the context that I have had many of these things said to me, and I would like to make sure that they, as health care providers, did not make the same mistakes that would loose the respect and trust of their patients. I did not think I ranted or rampaged. Now, I'm afraid that the whole group thinks I'm a raging lunatic. Don't they get this is my entire life? This is what I eat, think and breathe all the time, every day? This is my life people! Of course I'm passionate about it!!!!!! I live and will die by this disease! I am so angry that she actually said that to me.
As I was thinking about how I needed to write this all out, I opened up blogger to post this. It would not let me sign on until I upgraded to the new blogger. Again, I felt anger rising within me. What if I don't want to upgrade? I' m just learning the old blogger! I don't want to learn a new one! I just want to write a freaking post!
I am an angry person. This is what all the stress has done to me. It makes me angry that I haven't been below 200 all day long, and that I have to change my site. It makes me angry that my suitemate asks the most ridiculous questions over and over again. It makes me angry that people are so stupid. It all makes me so angry, and I don't want to take it any more! UUGGHH!!!

What would you want them to know?

Once again, I want your input on something. If you had an opportunity to tell your future nurses anything you wanted about diabetes and its care, what would you like them to know?
One of my classes this semester is Pharmacology. I am in a study group with 5 other nursing students. The next chapter is on medications for the treatment for diabetes. I am taking this golden opportunity to educate the nurses of tomorrow. I'm having trouble figuring out which information is the most important. I thought I would get the opinions of other diabetics (or people with diabetes, depending on who you are :-) ). What are the biggest things nurses/doctors do that annoy you in reference to diabetes? What should they know? What do they "know" that needs to be unlearned? Basically, like the title says: What do you want them to know?

Awake

Falling, falling, falling

Juice

Sip

Swallow

Sip

Swallow

Sip-

Empty

Slipping, slipping, slipping

FOOD!

Fruitsnack

Chew

Swallow

Chew

Swallow

Falling!

Food!

Blood sugar?

Fumlbe

61

Relief

“Oh good, I’m low”

Slipping

Food!

Granola bar

Chew

Swallow

Chew

Swallow

FOOD!

Fruitsnack

Mouthful

Chew

Swallow

Slipping
Slipping
Slipping
Falling
Falling
Falling
Dark
Dark
Dark
Dark
Dark


Beep?

Beep?

Beep?

Pump?

“Your last blood glucose was low”

Confusion

Meter

356

Crap!

Bolus

Remembrance

Understanding

Fear

My new favorite song

My brother recently introduced me to Weird Al.
I love this song.

The video is nothing much, but oh, the words to the song. It just gets better the more I listen to it. Even if I don't love my pancreas, this is a great song.

Ranting and Raving

I saw a classic example this week of how badly extreme stress sends my blood sugar through the roof. Classic example: Wednesday, just before a major stress event, my blood sugar was a wonderful 123. Two hours later, with no food, a horrible 319.
What was the stress event? Well, that is a GREAT story. Be forewarned: I'm still angry.
Tuesday night, my parents stopped by my dorm room. They dropped off my mail, which included my statement from my wonderful (Did you catch the sarcasm?) college. I figured it was just that, a statement, saying I had a zero balance, since I had dropped my tuition check off two weeks prior.
Oh no. Of course not.
It's a statement with a late fee added on saying that I haven't paid. I knew full well I had paid. I made a special trip out to school to buy my books (all $1,000.95 worth) and to hand deliver my tuition check. Wednesday morning, I stop by to straighten out what I assumed was a simple mistake. I was armed with a copy of my check. I asked the woman at the front desk, who helpfully told me simply "we show you haven't paid." Well, thanks a lot. I couldn't figure that out by the Late notice statement I got! Finally after staring at each other for a minute, both thinking each other was crazy, she suggested I go see Kevin. Well, who the heck is Kevin? She pointed me to his office. I walked in, now starting to get a little angry. He did a search of their records, which showed no check of my amount ever processed there. So, basically, they LOST my check. He advised me to stop payment on the check. I was SO incredibly, fiercely angry. Now, I am a crier. I cry when I'm sad, when I'm frustrated and when I'm angry, and boy was I angry. So, of course, I started crying. I didn't expect to gain anything from it, but I did. They paid for the fees associated with the cancelled check fee, and promptly cancelled the late fee. I think I deserved that much since they LOST a check. MY check. I didn't even trust the Postal Service to deliver my check, so I hand delivered it. Now, I guess I've learned even that is not enough. I have to be annoying as sin and make them process it right then and there. Lesson Learned.
Rant Over.

I'm back!
I've been back on campus for a week, and my, what a week it has been. I started my nursing classes, and they are harder than I could have even imagined. I have seven classes including: Pharmacology, Nutrition, Microbiology, Health assessment, Pharmacology, Intro to Nursing and Basic Skills. Needless to say, while I have thought about blogging many, many times, homework has taken priority. My pharmacology professors told us to expect to read 12 to 16 hours a week for that class alone. Plus, I have classes that I need several hours outside of class time to practice. It is all a little overwhelming.
Partly because of all that stress, my blood sugars, up until the past few days have been a frightening roller coaster. There were two days in a row that I had a range of about 45 to 450. Yes, that does mean I hit the forties twice and the 450's twice. Just when I thought I was going to loose it, it started evening out. The past two days have been much better. It is a huge relief. I was stuck in a constant struggle between lows and their rebounds. I'm glad the cycle has stopped, if only momentarily while I gather my sanity.
Even though I have not been posting, I have been trying to keep up on reading. I hope I haven't lost all of you, my precious readers, due to my long absence. I will be trying to update more often, if only for my own sanity.

Just because it's cute, I thought I'd close with a picture of my niece from this summer.

I'm alive.
I think.
The holidays have kept me very busy. On top of all the Christmas stuff, I've been fighting the cold I got from babysitting my niece for the weekend(wasn't she so kind to pass it on to me?) and not getting enough sleep from my mini-road trip to Chicago.
I'm busy, very busy.
I've decided that rather than feel guilty about not updating, I'd put the blog on hold for a while. Instead, I will wait until my birthday (as of Friday I won't be a teenager anymore!)and Christmas is over, and I have my high speed internet connection back. Dial up is the worst!
Happy Holidays everyone!

343

I'm 343, and my concentration is shot. The next hour, if not more, is worthless. Usually, not a big deal. When cramming for finals, however, it is more than a little annoying. I have mountains of information that I need to learn in the next few days, and precious little time to do it. Now, my brain is all fuzzy. I feel like I'm in la-la land. I keep getting distracted even typing this post. Grr. I guess I'm going to have to resort myself to doing dishes and other unpleasant tasks until my blood sugar comes down and I can concentrate.

Exam week

I have final exams next week. Exam week = death. I'm sick of studying already, and I've barely studied. I plan to spend most of the day studying. I'm banning myself from reading blogs today. My list of blogs just keeps growing. It takes quite a while to read through all of them. This is great when I want to procrastinate, but I can't afford to do that this weekend. I'll be studying my life away! As long as I can keep my concentration, and something like this doesn't happen again, I should be fine.

Glycemic Index

I'm currently working on writing a paper on the glycemic index and the control of blood glucose. Why? Because my Physiology lab won't let me do the endocrinology lab. Why? Because eating food is BAD for diabetics. Grrrr. ANYWAY. I've never really gotten into the glycemic index. The research I've been finding is very conflicting. The Glycemic index is either a great thing or an evil thing, depending on who writes the article. I'm looking at reputable sites, like the American Diabetes Association and the American Dietetic Association. My question is: What does the OC, as a group of people who need to control their blood glucose think of the glycemic index? Has anyone seen any good studies on it? Have you tried it? What did you think?
Thanks!

I'm OK!

I got my urine test results back yesterday. My kidneys are 100% fine. All tests were normal. I am so relieved. As much as I was trying not to worry about it, I still thought about it too much. I'm glad it's done with.
I listened to my intuition today, and it was right. I put a new site in this morning. I felt like I should leave the old site in, just in case. I do not normally do that. The site usually itches enough that I want to get rid of it. It was a good thing I left it in, because just a few hours later (while away from home) I had a blocked tubing alert. I just had to disconnect from the new site and connect to the old. I felt a little like a robot that needed to plug in, but it saved me a whole lot of stress and extra work! I might have to do that a little more often.
Life is once again busy, busy, busy! I have one more week of class until exams, and then Christmas break! I'm really for a little R&R. There are so many things that come with the end of the semester, that I don't know how often I'll be updating. I'll try and keep reading though! I hope everyone had a wonderful weekend!

This list was made by a girl a few years younger than I who went to my high school. She was diagnosed with cancer a few weeks into her freshman year. She achieved remission, then relapsed. She had a bone marrow transplant. Then her kidneys started failing, so she had a kidney transplant. The prolonged steroid use damaged both her hips so she had hip replacement in both hips, one at a time. She has recurring Graft vs. Host disease (bad news for bone marrow patients). She has gone through SO MUCH! Yet she is so thankful. I know so often I grip so much it is easy to loose focus of the good things in life. Over this week, I'm going to try and make a list of my own. I encourage you to do the same. At some point, I'll post my list.
Her list:
1. Laughing so hard your face hurts.
2. A hot shower.
3. No lines at the grocery store.
4. Getting mail.
6. Taking a drive on a pretty road.
7. Hearing your favourite song on the radio.
8. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
9. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
10. Laughing/giggling.
11. A good conversation.
12. Finding a 20 in your coat from last winter.
13. Laughing at yourself.
14. Running through sprinklers.
15. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
16. Friends.
17. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
18. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
19. Making new friends or spending time with old ones.
20. Playing with a new puppy.
21. Sweet dreams.
22. Road trips with friends..or crazy ones with family!
23. Swinging on swings.
24. Song lyrics printed inside your new CD so you can sing along without feeling stupid.
25. Winning a really competitive game...such as BOGGLE with my mom.
26. Making chocolate chip cookies and eating so much dough you feel sick.
27. Seeing smiles and hearing laughter from your friends.
28.HUGS!!
29. Running into an old friend and realizing that some things (good or bad) never change.
30. Riding the best roller coasters over and over.
31. Watching the expression on someone's face as they open a much desired present from you.
32. Watching the sunrise and knowing who made it.
33. A special glance.
34. Being able to drink as much liquid as you want after having a kidney transplant...ok so not everyone understands this one..:)
35. Game night.
36. The smell of horses and hay...ok not for everyone :)
37. GETTING OUT OF BED EVERY MORNING AND THANKING GOD FOR ANOTHER BEAUTIFUL DAY!

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire. If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful when you don't know something, for it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times. During those times you grow.

Be thankful for your limitations, because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you're tired and weary, because it means you've made a difference.

It's easy to be thankful for the good things.

A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks.

Find a way to be thankful for your troubles, and they can become your blessings.

My Thankful list: ( A work in progess)
I have no homework tonight (I know, its a miracle.)
I have a warm roof over my head.
I have friends who support me.
I have a wonderful family who love and supports me unconditionally.
2 bottles of paid for insulin in the fridge.
Technology that keeps me ticking each and every day.
My admission to the nursing program
My endocrinologist who is the best!
My health, kidney condition or not.

A meme

Stolen from Major Bedhead

Explain what ended your last relationship?
Um...yeah. I've always been single. Depressing, I know.

When was the last time you shaved?
Um..Friday.

What were you doing this morning at 8 a.m.?
Sleeping!!! :-) I love Saturdays when I have no plans.

What were you doing 15 minutes ago?
Reading blogs.

Are you any good at math?
Depends on which kind of math. I'm not bad at Algebra, but I'm lost with geometry.

Your prom night, what do you remember about it?
Junior year was stressful (I was on 2 planning committees). Senior year was more fun. I didn't dance at all.

Do you have any famous ancestors?
Nope.

Have you had to take a loan out for school?
Oh heck yes. I am in dept up to my eyeballs. Luckily, if I work for 5 years as a nurse, I don't have to pay one of them back.

Last thing received in the mail?
A flyer for some event on campus. I don't get much mail.

How many different beverages have you had today?
One. Just water.

Do you ever leave messages on peoples answering machine?
Yes, although I always think I sound stupid.

Who did you lose your CONCERT virginity to?
A Christian equivalent of NSync or Backstreet boys. They were called Plus One.

Do you draw your name in the sand when you go to the beach?
No.

What's the most painful dental procedure you've had?
I've never had any dental procedures. I've never had any cavities.

What is out your back door?
I don't really have a back door...I just have the one door and outside of that is the hallway of my dorm.

Any plans for Friday night?
Yesterday I hung out with friends. Next Friday? No idea. I don't plan that far in advance.

Do you like what the ocean does to your hair?
I've never seen the ocean.

Have you ever received one of those big tins of 3 different popcorns?
No

Have you ever been to a planetarium?
Yes, in elementary school.

Do you re-use towels after you shower?
I'm a college student. Anything to generate less laundry is a GOOD THING.

Some things you are excited about?
Thanksgiving break!

What is your favorite flavor of JELL-O?
I HATE jello. I think it's because it was a free food when I was little so I had massive amounts of it, and can't stand it anymore.

Describe your keychain(s)?
Two keys: car and house. College keychain, one from Colorado, Chicago and DC.

Where do you keep your change?
A ladybug piggy bank. (It's my i-pod fund. In a few years I might actually be able to afford one).

When was the last time you spoke in front of a large group of people?
I have no idea.

What kind of winter coat do you own?
A purple Columbia coat.

What was the weather like on your graduation day?
Sunny, I don't really remember the temp. I think it was nice.

Do you sleep with the door to your room open or closed?
Closed.

I have no idea what I am doing computer, and html code wise. I couldn't even put the code in for the diabetes OC ring. It took me several months to figure out how to put in links. So I need a little help. Why is my about me and all that on the bottom of my page? Any ideas?
My second question is about beta blogger. Should I switch? Is it better, or will it just confuse the crap out of me?
Thanks in advance!

*edit*
Muahahahaha! I figured it out! My post about getting into the nursing program with its six million exclamation points was messing everything up. It's back to normal now!

I REFUSE to be scared.

I had an endocrinologist appointment today. It was really short at just under an hour. My a1c was 7.4. I was somewhat pleased with that number. I expected it be higher, based on my control lately. But I had set a goal for myself of having an a1c right around 7.0. Six months ago, I was there. It has risen every since. First 7.2, now 7.4. The other slightly bad news is that I had protein in my urine. I know it can happen sometimes and not mean anything. I am more worried about what it COULD mean. I am trying my best NOT to be scared. I am 19 and I do not want to be dealing with complications. Dialysis is something that scares almost as much as loosing my eye sight. I refuse to live the next few weeks until I do a repeat test in fear. I can not do that to myself. Odds are, because of where I am in my cycle, (sorry guys) it is nothing. Here's hoping that's true.

D-blog Day

I am taking a class called physiology right now. For those who don't know, it's pretty much the "How things work" for the body. It's crazy hard, but I like it. There is a three hour lab every week where we pretty much run medical test on ourselves. Today was the urine lab.
I dreaded this lab just about as much as the I am dreading the upcoming endocrine lab. What will my class say about my most likely abnormal test results? Which ones will be abnormal? Will I discover some complication today? Will there be blood or protein in my urine? Are you kidneys starting there decline? I'm sure others in my lab were not worried they would have abnormal test results. But I was.
I am a diabetic.
I have long accepted that.
I have been relatively lucky. I have had pretty decent control with not a whole lot of work. Except lately. Lately, is has take SO MUCH WORK! They say (who, I can't remember, but someone said it) that it takes an hour a day to manage diabetes. Some days that seems low, and some days it seems high. But let's think about that. An hour a day, for 17 years. That's 6,205 hours. 258 days. TWO HUNDRED FIFTY EIGHT DAYS!! Think of all I could have done with those days. That's three quarters of a year I could have wasted on something else entirely. Wow. If that doesn't blow you away, I don't know what will. I had another whole point, but I am so blow away by that, I'm just going to wait. 258 days. Gone.

Out of Control

I have had so many things to blog about lately, and absolutely no time to write about them. This week is my catch up week. The competition/choir I was a part of is now done (my class won, in case you were wondering- Go 09!). That gives me an extra couple of hours a night. I got into the nursing program, which is a HUGE relief, but it brings a whole new set of things to do. Next semester is going to be INSANE. I am taking 7 classes. It will be worth it though.
My control has been so horrible. I did not realize how horrible until I downloaded my pump in preparation for my endo appointment Monday. My daily averages have been in the 200's. As high as 260. YIKES! That is horrible. I don't know if it is just because I've been so busy, because I've had(actually still have) a cold or a combo of both. So starting today, i cracked down. Every single carb that enters my mouth is getting bolused for. I am making myself stop and think before I eat, and after I check myself so I can figure out what's going on. I have been merely reacting. I was still testing and bolusing, but just the bare minimum. I have not been proactive about how to prevent huge spikes and valleys. I will not be able to get it reigned back in by the time I go to the doctor on Monday, but at least I will have a plan. Its a good thing I printed the information off. It was a real wake-up call. Once I think back on it, I know I could make myself feel a lot better by lowering my blood sugars. Already today I've seen a little bit of difference in how I feel. Here's hoping I can continue!